Running Early, Stealing Time, Paybacks Are Hell

This morning I was actually out of the house early. Go figure. Unfortunately I was too early since I made it to the coffee shop twenty minutes before they opened. Bummer. Noticing that Ellen was in there setting up I tapped on the door, waived hello, turned around and headed off to work. I am now drinking mediocre coffee. Bummer Squared.

Why Is It The One Time I Try To Buy Porn?
As a joke I was going to buy a friend of mine porn for his 41st birthday which is today. Alas, I think I went to Puritan Kroger because not only could I not find porn, I couldn’t any of the porn alternatives such as FHM, Stuff, etc. Sorry man, I tried. At least there should be no payback when I turn forty in July.

Trivia, Decatur Style
It seemed like a great idea. Since none of the trivia (ir)regulars had concrete plans for the evening (mine fell through do to an illness) we decided to play trivia and spend the $40 in house cash we won a few weeks ago at Raging Burrito. The food was good, the service was fair (they appeared dreadfully short-handed), but the trivia was crap. The guy started at 8:30pm, and droned on for more than two hours. This would have been bad enough, but given the fact that Raging is a brick cavity, the sound is awful and the room is loud. Never again. I repeat, never again, at least not for trivia. Oh yeah, we finished first, winning another $40 in house cash.

You Look Sooo Familiar…
One of my “talents” (or “curses”) is to recognize faces and recall where I saw them. [authors note: the only time that this didn’t happen is with last year’s carjacking. It must have been something about those guns they had pointed at me]

Recently my mind has been taxed (and it’s not even April 15th) by this on a few occasions.

The first was someone I recognized prior to a Taco Mac trivia night. After a few moments I realized that it was someone who used to hang with my old happy-hour crowd. Maybe if I would have spilled another margarita into her lap she would have recognized me.

The other occurrence forced me to endure a commercial about this product called Seasonale. Ladies, this one is for you — not only can you get birth control, you can reduce the number of periods you have to four a year. It’s a dessert topping and a floor wax! Oh, the woman in the commercial played “Ashleigh, The Bitch” on my favorite faux-reality series The Joe Schmo Show.

Websites Of The Week (my name is Paulie and I have endorsed this message)
It’s been a slow week in Lake Wobegon, but here are the places I have visited in order to forget about the sixty-two inches of snow outside.

  • A Prairie Home Companion – I love the radio show, and feel lucky to have seen it performed live at The Fox Theater. I also love Keillor’s books! See, I do read…. occasionally
  • CheapoVegas – Word on the street is that I’ll turn forty on The Strip. I sure hope so! Viva Las Vegas!
  • National Confectioners Association – Just looking at their banner (gumdrops and chocolate) makes me happy! I could have done without the Valentine’s reminder, but hey it is one of their Big days. Be careful, merely surfing this site may add five pounds.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood – still unhappy because my knee hurts, rushed so much to do
Current Music – Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing William Shatner – “Common People”
Current Read – nothing currently (but tonight I plan to read my Cargo magazine, really I do)

Paulie [eatl/ga]

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4 Responses to Running Early, Stealing Time, Paybacks Are Hell

  1. Stae says:

    Wait a minute here. Are you telling me you know where to find 40 oz. fat boys in your neighborhood, but not porn?! Dude, I so do NOT believe you.

  2. Paulie says:

    I don’t need paper porn for myself, I’ve got the internet and all the free tv I can consume. 🙂

    I was buying it for a friend and I was sure that the Kroger would have it. Ooops, guess I was wrong.

  3. I almost let today go by without my two bucks worth! What the hell is that about?

    So…let’s see…nice 80’s reference…

    You can buy porn at your local convenience store, but I have NEVER seen it at a Kroger. They are all puritan that way.

    Not sure whether to congratulate you on winning trivia, or condolences for where you won…hmmm…you’re 40 bucks to the good. That’s 20 blog comments from me!!! Pay up Splenda Daddy!

    Maybe she would have remembered you if you had picked up a straw and tried to finish the margarita. Just a suggestion.

    As for your reading material…alrighty then. May you strip on the strip for your big 4-0 and don’t stress about V-Day. All the candy is now half price!

    Here’s my 50 cents tip for the day…

    Wanna feel better? Wrap the knee, turn off Shatner, and put Cargo in the bathroom rack where it belongs. Put on some of those hip shoes of yours and go out dancing! Try a new place! Pick a girl totally OUT of your comfort zone and go for a spin around the dance floor. You might find my dear Will that Dr. Smith’s advice is not all it’s cracked up to be.
    Cheers! Paulie 🙂

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