Inside The Perimeter

I’ve filled out all the forms
And signed on the bottom line
You kept taking too much from me
It’s time to give me back what’s mine!

Taxes are in the mail — finally!

That’s Apprentical
(skip ahead if you don’t want to know about last night’s episode)

I got to catch last night’s Apprentice episode on dvr (the Dish Network variety). A quick aside, people if you haven’t discovered the world of dvr you are really missing out. An hour episode can be watched in 41-43 minutes! Sweet!

Chris, the completely unpolished “real estate millionaire” was “fired” last night. The funny thing was that Trump told him that he needed to get his anger issues under control. The airing of this episode really makes the fact that he was arrested in a Tampa casino last week funnier.

If it already hasn’t beed done I think that someone needs to start a Trump Index and track the stock of the sucka companies that pimp their warez on The Apprentice. That Pontiac Solstace that they were pushing last night looked pretty sweet. Oh wait, it’s a GM. Nevermind.

It’s Not What You Drink, It’s Were You Drink It
I had a wonderful dinner with friends last night at the Inman Park Patio (may I suggest the Duck Pizza Pie?). The night was made even better when the bill arrived and I discovered that the Sweetwater 420s that I drank cost a mere $2 each! Wooo Hooo!

MONDAY! MONDAY! MONDAY!
The Atlanta Falcons have not one, but three regular-season Monday night home games scheduled for the 2005 season! Whoa, Ron Mexico is The Man! Not only that, he’ll be stuffing the Thanksgiving Turkey in Motown on Thanksgiving Day. I know what I’ll be doing after running the Atlanta Half Marathon this year.

ARGH, my DSL connection if fucking S-L-O-W today!!!

How Does He Reach The Pedals?
Lovelable little person Emmanuel Lewis was pulled over for speeding in southwestern Georgia yesterday. The USA Today, America’s High School Newspaper has the complete story here.

I’m Ready To Return To The Drunken Clam, Are You?
FAMILY GUY, May 1st!
FAMILY GUY, May 1st!
Can you tell that I am excited? I’ve already got my dvr set to record. If your an uber geek you may even want to subscribe to the Family Guy RSS feed.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - a bit hungover, ready for weekend…
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing the Mooney Suzuki “Alive & Amplified”
Website Of The Day - The Cartoon Fridge, supposedly streaming cartoons/animation to you!

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

Now there’s a lovely image to conjure up. Fear not, this post has nothing to do with the “o” word bouncing around in your perverted little mind.

Organization
Last night I was feeling extremely anti-social. I wasn’t in the mood to run, or to hang out drinking beer with my friends. *feels head to see if fever has set in* No sir, All I wanted to do was to be alone and clean up the piles of shit (not literal shit mind you because that would be disgusting) which have taunted me for weeks. I love organization. No, I really loooooove being organized.

He Knew About O-Rings
Sit down for this. Yesterday I ordered a book from Amazon, and I really think I am going to read this one.

About fifteen years ago I learned of the physicist Richard Feynman, and have been fascinated by his life ever since. He was a modern-day genius and one of the panel of experts that figured out that the space shuttle Challenger went BOOM because of the O-Rings. Yesterday I found out that there is a new book

which chronicles letters sent between him and his wife while he was working on the Manhattan Project. I’m game.

Cellphones Are Evil
What has happened to people’s manners? While I was in Whole Foods the other day waiting in line I witnessed a lovely young couple sitting in a booth eating. The entire time I was there a cellphone was glued to the girl’s ear. Rude, just fucking rude.

It reminded me of the blind date I was on a few years ago where the girl had set up an “emergency” that she just had to take care of. Imagine the odds of your good friend’s car breaking down and you are the only one who can help? Sweetheart, I wasn’t stupid, I knew the “get me out of here” call when I see it. By the way, the feeling was mutual and look on your face when I told you to leave was priceless!!

Some Other Things I Learned Playing Poker

• The guy who made Super Size Me is making a tv show: Apparently Morgan Spurlock has a hand in devloping a tv ‘reality’ show based on his documentary.
• People really can win in Vegas: One of the guys at the table had just returned from a fruitful poker trip to Vegas.
• The Braves have great starting pitching, but their bullpen couldn’t hold a lead if it had a handle on it: And they proved it again yesterday.
• Calling for food delivery is *always* a gamble: Living in East Atlanta I have given up on having food delivered. The other night half of the food order was wrong and it took an hour for the restaurant to rectify it. I guess I don’t miss calling for food.
• Trembling hands make for great tells: Poker face I have, poker hands I am still working on
• I was the only one drinking alcohol, and I *still* won money!: People always say that you should not drink when you gamble. Whatever…

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - eh, I am in a Code Orange sort of mood
Current Music - Oingo Boingo? Nope. O-Town? C’mon, give me a break! Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Mando Diao “You Can’t Steal My Love”
Website Of The Day - Modern Ruins Photographic Essays — Some photography that might make you say “Oh, my God!”, or “Holy Shit!”

Cheerio!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

Wednesday is my hardest blogging day. It always seems like I’ve spent all of the decent stuff, and am too far away from the weekend to start thinking about it.

Poker, I Hardly Know Her
I kicked it old school last night by hanging around the work hood to play some poker. My handy PDA informed me that I haven’t played in nearly ten months. Wow, time passes quickly. My decision to play was a good one, as I seemed to get cards all night. I finished on the positive side of the ledger, with enough cash to cover the cost of dinner and beer.

Beer, The New Cigarettes?
Seems like everytime I go to buy beer in a grocery store the price is higher. Prior to heading to the poker game I stopped in at the Whole Foods Yuppiedome on LaVista to grab a six-pack. Remember, this is Paulie you are reading about, so you know that the beer purchased may have seen St Louis or Milwaukee in transit only. The cheapest six-pack of “decent” beer was $6.99, and locally-brewed Sweetwater was $8.49. Hey man, can I bum a beer off you?

Atlanta Traffic Question
You are traveling down a road and you see a police car with its lights on trying to turn right onto the street you are on. Do you?

a) assume the officer has his lights on for an important reason and stop to allow him to merge into traffic

b) continue happily forward, ignoring the situation, assuming that its the “next guy’s” responsibility to let the officer in

Apparently no fewer than six people answered “b” this morning! Holy Shit people, get your head out of your asses and follow a few traffic laws! What a bunch of fucking assholes….

Britanny’s Pregnant, And I Really Couldn’t Give A Shit
I hope that we get to see this picture revisited in nine months.

It seems like the appropriate offspring to me.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - depressed
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing The Jesus & Mary Chain — “Blues From A Gun”
Website Of The Day - Atlanta Citysearch’s Guide For Girls’ Night Out. As the headline read “Gather up your gal pals: Top spots for a ladies-only night on the town.” Do it! I’ll be the creepy old man in the corner.

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

In Bowling It’s A 300; At Johnny’s Pizza It’s A 330
Meet The Hashers took a giant step toward becoming a next-generation Wizards (those of you who have played trivia at Manuel’s Tavern on Sunday nights understand what I mean).

Last night we scored a perfect score at The Trivia Factory’s version of team trivia. NEMESIS!

We went to Johnny’s to crush skulls and eat good pizza. I’d say that we got one out of two — the skull crushing, the pizza was too overcooked for my NY sensibilities. It was a good thing that there was plenty of cheese to go along with the whining coming from all around us as well. “They’re cheating!” “Look how many people they have!” Boo-Fucking-Hoo, people.

Playing at Johnny’s is like shooting fish in a barrel, and the payout is less than at other places. We know all of that going in, but the beer and food are cheaper so it’s usually a decent alternative. However, I need to start ordering better beer, that PBR killed me. I need to be drunk before I start drinking PBR.

These Are The People In Your Neighborhood
Driving down to Johnny’s I got to see Elephantitus Man standing waiving his cain near the corner of Ponce and Briarcliff. One day I hope to see him while riding my bike (in bike shorts) and get a picture of the two of us. I’ll gladly post it here, appropriately titled “Polar Opposites”. Wish me luck.

Hmm, Maybe That Sembler Thing Is Not As Bad As I Thought
I’m still going to grumble when traffic is shitty, but I noticed yesterday that the Sembler monstrosity, aka the Edgewood Shopping District is going to have a Kroger. Ok, I’m not a huge fan of the chain, but it will be a grocery store near, and more importantly on my way home from work. The Publix in East Lake is ok, but out of the way, and the Kroger past my hood down Moreland has never thrilled me (from now on my trips down there will be to get some Chinese pick-up at China King).

CDs Dropping, Not Too Hot
Garbage? Mariah Carey? American Hi-Fi? No thanks, I’ll pass. Instead, I’ll suggest you do what I’ve done the last couple of days. Drop by a used cd store and buy something that reminds you of better days. My purchase yesterday was Oingo Boingo’s “Dead Man’s Party” — worth it for “Weird Science”, but it has other great tunes as well.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - not sure, it’s one of those days and this can’t be good!
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 25 playing Monkees — “Love To Love”
Website Of The Day - Back Porch Records, an interesting smaller label containing Charlie Sexton, Frank Black, as well as a great band from Ohio called Over The Rhine.

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

It’s Monday. You know the routine. Grab some coffee, get comfy, and read about the ridiculous two days that I call my weekend.

Back In The Saddle Again
On Saturday morning I resumed my assault on fitness (Friday’s happy hour at Brewhouse didn’t help, however). With the temperature a good 25-30 degrees warmer than the Saturday before I put on my favorite YooHoo bike jersey and hopped my Cycle of Shame for the 38-mile ride from my house to Stone Mountain and back. Two hours and twenty-three minutes, not bad for an old man! My ride was followed by a shower and strong power nap.

Running Like I Am Standing Still
One thing I learned this weekend is that the days of following a “long” ride with a “long” run may be over. An attempt at an eight mile (queue the Eminem) run yesterday was a complete disaster. As I watched the group separate and leave me, I stopped, turned around, and walked back to the start. Pathetic, truly pathetic.

Putting On My Red Neck
The first yardwork of the season occurred this weekend. And, because my upper-torso is usually as white as a milk I decided to sport a tank-top t-shirt while mowing the lawn around the double-wide. Here’s a tip for you readers, Irish-Germanic heritage makes for lousy tanning stock.

0 and 162?
Imagine my surprise when I watched my suckass NY Mets comeback to win, eventhough they struck out eighteen times in yesterday’s game! Baseball can be a cruel sport, just ask John Smoltz.

Damn, This Is Tougher Than I Thought
I have always sworn that I would never pay for radio. Shit, I bought an iPod to avoid going the satellite radio route. Common sense tells me that I don’t need it nevermind the added expense, especially when you factor in that Dish Network carries a bundle of Sirius‘ music stations. The lure of hearing any baseball game anywhere I getting XM with a MyFi receiver sounds soooo sweet. I love baseball on the radio…

what u doing
That was the text message which popped on my phone last night. The number seemed familiar but still unrecognizable, so I replied “Laundry? Who is this?”. The response “who do u want it to be” made me laugh. Certainly it was one of my friends just fucking with me. I found out quickly that I was wrong. Apparently some “girl” named “Elizabeth — Lizzie to her friends” text messaged the wrong person. Assuming I was probably at least twice her age I ended the “conversation” quickly. Random, but kind of fun.

Out For Blood
Meet The Hashers will be trivia’ing at Johnny’s Pizza in Inman. It’s not a Team Trivia location and we can usually do well there. Man, I’m already craving pizza.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - hungry
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Eels — “Novocaine For The Soul”
Website Of The Day - The Trivia Factory’s site, go get tonight’s first answer

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

[Hermey]
Why am I such a misfit?
I am not just a nit wit!
You can fire me
I quit!
Seems I don’t fit in.

(um, no I didn’t quit my job….)

Can I Get A Wingman Over Here?
Showing up to Hand In Hand was an exercise in futility. Sadly, I knew it would be. The only reason I followed through with going was because I didn’t want to be the type of pussy too afraid to try something new.

It reminded me of showing up to a party in which I knew no one, not even the host. The idea was simple enough

1. show up
2. hope to recognize the host
3. attempt to introduce myself
4. hope to fit in with everyone else

I successfully made it to stage one.

My arrival, exactly on time (fuck, I hate myself), was followed by a tour of the bar in hopes of finding the host; I didn’t. So I did the one thing I know how to do well, ordered a beer (a $5.75 Tetley’s, yikes!). I sat a table, peered at the Braves game, read email on my cellphone (to ‘out’ myself as a nerd), watched a couple of good looking couples interact on dates, listened to the frat boys behind me, and waited. Thirty minutes later I was through with my beer and got up to leave. I think I passed the group with whom I was supposed to meet, but I was hellbent on leaving , so I did.

[Rudolph]
Why am I such a misfit?
I am not just a nit wit!
Just because my nose glows
Why don’t I fit in?

I Remember Doing The Time Warp
I had the strangest dinner (at Publix, hehe) last night. The only thing that would have made it stranger would have been seeing that weird fucking old man that is in the Publix / Six Flags commercial walk into the store. I know that it’s trick photography and CGI, but that commercial fucking wigs me out!

While in Publix the clock on my cell phone went back an hour, from 6pm to 5pm. Is this Publix (the one on Buford Hwy near N. Druid Hills) in its own Indiana-like non-Daylight- Savings-Time world? My clock corrected itself while driving toward the Highlands.

On A Wing And A Prayer
The reason for dinner at Publix was because I
a) was hungry
b) like their chicken wings

I must say that at $5.99/lb their wings are not as cheap as I remember them being, but what the fuck, I was in the mood.

These were the biggest wings I have ever seen! I think that given a chance, the chickens that sprouted those wings could have flown back north for the Summer. In shrimp parlance, these wings were 8-10, meaning you got between eight and ten to the pound. Meeeeaaaaty.

Keep Your Flavors Out Of My Water!
I mistakenly bought a “AquaFina with Lemon Flavoring” to drink with my wings o’plenty last night. Look, when I want lemon flavoring I will buy lemonade ‘kay? The worst part was that I didn’t realize what I had done until I took the first sip. I nearly did a huge spittake all over the Publix, um cafeteria.

The same goes for lemon/lime wedges placed on the rim of my water glass. Keep them off my glass, thank you. ’nuff said.

I Can’t Buy Beer, But I Can Buy Porn?
Driving past Southern Nights Videos last night I noticed a sign that mentioned that they are open 24/7. Huh? You mean to tell me that I can’t buy a beer on Sunday for “religious reasons”, but I can walk in and buy pictures/movies of naked women? Hell, if there are, um, ‘movie rooms’ in the place they are probably open too. Where’s the fucking logic in this?

I’m Now A ‘Made’ Man
Fuck you, you fucking fucks! Payback time has arrived, as yesterday I became a made man! Oh, wait a minute, all I really did was buy a new nerdzine called Make. It’s a magazine full of nerd hacks which will only stir the innards of nerds like me. Now where did I put that soldering iron? Also underway is an assault on the programming language PHP.

The way I look at it is that if I can’t get dates (which is almost a constant) then I might as well return to living the life of a nerd. I can’t wait until I start having cold pizza and Mountain Dew for breakfast again. W00t!

Don Sutton? I Though He Was 86′ed?
Why did I think that Don Sutton was “relieved of his duties” after last season? I was shocked to see him doing the TBS broadcast last night. Who did Chip Caray replace? I guess my Braves knowledge hasn’t come North from Spring Training yet.

Take Me Out To The Ballgame
Other than affixing tape to my glasses, my biggest plan for the weekend is to go watch my winless NY Mets play the (hated) Braves at Turner Field. I’ll be the one in the Mets hat. Bring it on! I know the Mets suck! And you, my friend, can go fuck yourself. Fuggettaboudit!

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - weeeekend arrives in T minus 8 hours!
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing The Afghan Whigs — “Gentlemen”
Website Of The Day - FUCK, the word for any occassion!

Ch33rs!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

Tax Addict
My preliminary pass at my taxes are done. And, although I know I’ve given the Gubment an interest-free loan over the last 365 days, I’ll be getting some of my green back! WoooHoo! Gentlemen, start your eCommerce engines…

You know that I have to have at least one gripe, right?

Thanks to TurboTax (and an amazingly good job of recordkeeping) the process was not overly painful. For the first time ever I decided I was going to eFile. But first a little backgrounder…

The US Postal Service is supposedly a private industry. In years past I always griped that I had to spend 30-something cents to mail my taxes in. Why? With millions of tax filers I saw it as a completely unfair business practice. Then arrived Mr. Gore’s Wild Ride and the advent of electronic filing. Screw you Postal Service, I’m eFiling!

I clicked on eFile with glee to find out that while eFiling my Federal taxes was gratis, the state of Georgia wants me to pay $15 in order to file electronically. What the fuck is this?!? Goddammit, I pay taxes when I make money, I pay taxes when I spend money, and now another $15 in order to “settle up” with the State Gubment? This shit has gone way too far…

Keep Your Comments Coming
Some of you have had problems with InsideThePerimeter and have told me so. Thanks! No, really, thanks! I admit to being new at this game, eventhough I applied to be Al Gore’s ‘Right Hand Man’ when he created the Internet. Here are some known issues, and hopefully an adequate explanation for today

• Mac users having problems scrolling: I have no access to a Mac, although I am toying with the idea of getting a Mac Mini as a toy once my taxes are settled.
• It sure is hard to read some of the text: HTML coding and Cascading Style Sheets are still relatively new to me, so this is all a work in progress.
• Live Journal readers can’t see the right galley: Can’t help you there (at least I don’t think so). It appears that my RSS feed, which is what LJ reads in, only covers the current entry.
• Why no pictures: Twofold — One, I can’t get myself to carry my camera around; Two, I am just learning the ins-and-outs of Flickr. I tried Picasa and wasn’t overly enjoyed (although I now see that they have a new version). Shit, since I am teaching myself PHP I might as well get around to setting up an Apache server and learning how to host my own pics…

Stick with me.
Tell me what you like and don’t like.
Send me suggestions!
Spread The Word! I won’t be happy until I reach all areas bounded by I285. Those outside can start their own website, OutsideThePerimeter.com may be available.

Bloggers In The Light Of Day; Bloggers In The Dark Of Night
In a rare move, Bloggers of this city might escape their keyboards (although I am sure there will be a fair number of Crackberries, Treo 650s, and other internet-enabled devices abound) and go out in public. Yes, another Atlanta blogger, mingaling (link will be removed upon author’s request), has arranged a ‘Meeting of the Minds’ at Hand in Hand tonight at 7:30pm. When I inquired as to how I would be able to identify the group, her reply was

Oh, I don’t think you’ll have a problem. Look for the crew talking about RSS feeds!

Brilliant!
I’ll be the one with the beer in hand, hopefully a Smithwick’s (pronounced Smid’-icks).

Join Me On The Bandwagon
Beck’s cd “Guero” is fucking awesome! What makes me laugh is that I have noticed this cd referenced in most of the blogs I have been reading lately. Amazingly when I swung by the Moreland Target the other day, it was sold out. Hmmmm, take that 50cent!

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - weeeekend, hurry up!
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Elliot Smith — “A Distorted Reality Is Now A Neccessity” (yes, again!)
Website Of The Day - Beer Hunter, not the Michael Jackson on trial.

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

Man, you can tell its springtime in Atlanta. Everything is green — the grass, the trees, the streets, the cars, everything, except my wallet! I’ve undergone some major brain scrambling lately…

Check It, Check It, Check It Out
Look to the right galley (if you are not reading this via LiveJournal or on a Mac). Check out my fancy new section called “Holla At Me” at the top and the new fortune at the bottom. I think that yesterday’s cookie was destined for someone else, because none of the people I have met recently want to play any role in my life, never mind an important one…

Better Than A Crocus
Growing up in New York we used to say that Spring had arrived when you saw the first Crocus sprout. My Spring indicator in Atlanta is poison ivy and pinetree pollen. Currently battling both, I am appeased only by the notion that I will soon be able to ride my bike in non-snowy conditions.

No, Seriously, You Want Me To Pay To Watch It?
Holy Crap Fox has big brass balls. A week or so ago I mentioned that they had put a couple of mid-season cancelled shows on the internet so that the eight of us who were watching them on free tv could see their conclusions. I managed to see the ending of “My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss” and must say that it was brilliant! I hope that the arse who decided it should be cancelled was fired from his/her position. Tsk! Tsk!

Then I went online to see the last episodes of “Playing It Straight”.

In case you don’t remember, the premise of this show was that an incredibly cute girl was placed on a dude ranch (oh so clever) surrounded by a beny of male-model-quality men so that she could find her perfect mate. What she was told on the first episode was that some of men were gay, and that if she picked one of them as “her Man”, he would get a large sum of cash and she would get nothing and like it! She quickly turned into a modern-day Joseph McCarthy trying to out the Gaymunists. Disturbing and entertaining at the same time, and did I mention that she was incredibly cute, I was hooked. But I digress…

I clicked through to Fox to try and figure out where I was last summer when the show was cancelled, only to be told that I could rent each episode for $1.99. What? Seriously? Come On! Smithers, fire the stupid bloke who thought that this was a good idea!

Fox, do you really expect me to pay to watch a show that you wouldn’t keep on free tv?!?!

Surfing Sans Al Gore’s Internet
Last week I also watched a movie called “Step Into Liquid“, which was a surfumentary. The movie was made by Dana Brown, who is the son of Bruce Brown, the man who made “Endless Summer“.

The movie could have been titled “Surfin’ ‘Round The World” as it documented people surfing in different regions of the world. Some, like Texas and Wisconsin, came as a complete surprise to me. I guess surfing is a state of mind, perhaps a demented state of mind, but a state of mind nonetheless.

If you like beautifully shot movies with a decent backing soundtrack and you have ninety minutes to spare I think that “Step Into Liquid” is a worthy rent.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - hooked on the television
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Elliot Smith — “A Distorted Reality Is Now A Neccessity”
Website Of The Day - Grasshopper, wax your board with Mr. Zog’s Sex Wax

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

April 15th’s A Comin’
I swear this routine of doing my taxes gets more troublesome each year. Just imagine if I did real financial shit like buy/sell stocks, own rental property, or something along those lines! Gone are the days went I can crap on a 1040-EZ and laugh at the gubment. Tonight’s Task du Jour is to park my ass in front of the pc, pray that I have collected all documentation in one folder (something that was commonplace when I was truly OCD-Paulie) and fight the good fight. Hell, I think that if I get some cash back it might be time to spring for a pre-mid-life-crisis toy.

What’s The Deal With Gmail?
Since Gmail introduced their “Infinity + 1″ storage system I have seen my brower spin its wheels like a car trying to go up a muddy hill. Let’s go boys (and girls), if you are going to be Numero Uno, you need to get you duckies in a row!

Play Ball!
I am a child of the final “Baseball Generation” (at least in my view). My impressionable youth ended just as major league baseball players started became Million Dollar Assholes. Even with the disgust I have toward today’s overpaid .257 hitting middle infielder, I want to love the game again. Hope springs eternal, so far my Mets have only blown one save, and all that sort of shit. Last night I wanted nothing more than to turn on the tellie and listen to a game (baseball is a game which can be heard and/or seen, football is a game which must be seen) whilst I pecked away at Mr. Gore’s Wild Internet. Alas, Major League Baseball saw fit to have no night games last night. Sure, I know that the NCAA’s Men’s Basketball Championship game was on, but I am not a bball fan and baseball is America’s Pastime, give us an alternative!

Drop It Like It’s Hot
It’s not a great day for US cd releases, unless of course you’ve been Jonesin’ for another Lisa Marie Presley cd. I’ll avoid her offering, which includes a terrible cover of Don Henley’s “Dirty Laundry”, and pick The Crystal Method’s “Community Service II” as my CD Release Of The Day. While I don’t have any of the gay in me, I can appreciate the Method’s music for what its worth.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - completely confused
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Bright Eyes — “Another Traveling Song”
Website Of The Day - My friend Dejie is a singer and now she’s got a website.

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]

“What Was I Thinking?!?” That was the common theme of this weekend. If I asked myself that once, I asked it a thousand times.

Suches Life
On Saturday morning I rode up to Suches, Georgia to do the inaugural ALS Mountain Mania Ride. The Weather Channel predicted cloudy and windy conditions with temperatures in mid-forties and windchills in the mid-thirties. BRRRR!!! I packed accordingly. What the Weather Channel never mentioned was snow which would melt making everthing wet as well! FUCKING BRRRR!!!

Now, I am far from the most sane individual you’ll meet, and with about fifty or so likeminded half-minds I started out on the planned fifty mile ride.

The first time I lost feeling in my toes I realized that my journey was that of a fool’s. That was at mile fifteen. But I was there to ride fifty miles dammit!

When we all pulled into a gas station around mile twenty-eight and the bubbas who were there started laughing at us for being out in the snow/rain I realized that they were smarter than me. One of them saw the income potential in our stupidy and offered to give us a ride back to the start in his cattle trailer for a mere $200. Had I packed any money (why didn’t I?) I would have paid him in full. But I was there to ride fifty miles dammit! So, I put some baggies on my feet in hopes to ward off frostbite and returned to the saddle.

At mile twenty-nine my quadriceps started to cramp, something to do with the transition from cold to warm to cold again I think. Food and drink were my “remedy” and I continued onward. The cramps were gone by mile thirty-one.

At mile thirty-two an angel appeared in the form of my friend Kat in a car that had a bike rack. It was at that point that I saw my friend get off his bike and I asked him “Are you quitting?”. No sooner did the word “yes” escape his mouth when I jumped off my bike as well. I thought “But I am here to ride fifty miles dammit!” and then realized that this was the one time I should use that sliver of sanity I possess and give up.

Yes Virginia, it can snow in Georgia in April. I have friends who have pictures to prove it.

Ack Ack A Dack Worth
Sunday’s sunny weather surely meant that all would be better in the world. An early morning (sleep minus one hour thanks to Daylight Savings Time) six-mile run followed by breakfast and beer was just what the doctor ordered.

Unfortunately my Sunday morning compadres are also hashers, including the half-wit I rode thirty-two miles with the day before. With a minor tug at my manhood they guilted me into going to Ackworth, Georgia to run the hash. Have I mentioned that I am not too bright?

I knew what I was getting into; at least I thought I did. With last week’s rain timid creeks now needed to be swam. Did you know that the water temperature in April is still quite cold? I found out not once, but three times! Elaine, do women know about Shrinkage?

More Ticketmaster Grumbling
The ticket I just bought to see Bright Eyes and The Faint at Earthlink Live cost $36.10. The “ticket” cost $25.00, the other $11.10, or 44% of the ticket price, was for “Convenience Charge” ($7.60) and “Order Processing Fee” ($3.50). This is just fucking nuts!

It’s a pity that my insurance no longer pays for psychiatric care…

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood - worn out, dim-witted, in the dumps
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Ween — “Transdermal Celebration”
Website Of The Day - National Association of Psychiatric Health Systems

Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]