And I Quote “And Now For Something Completely Different!”

Rain has fallen and there will be no whining like yesterday’s steaming pile of dung. Today it cannot rain on people’s parade, but it can rain on those standing in line to purchase an iPhone. I sure hope them iPhones are waterproof, or at least water resistant.

You are probably now wondering to yourself

Hey Paulie, you’re an amazingly hip, attractive man with gobs of cash on hand which can easily be transformed into the current “Coolest Phone of the Millennium — the iPhone”. Why are you not out at a conveniently located Apple store or Company-owned AT&T store waiting in line with the masses? Have you hired a homeless person or illegal immigrant to stand in line for you until the iPhones go on sale?

To which I reply

You are correct on many levels Timmy (which is what I would call you regardless of your actual name) except that Paulie rarely buys “version 1.0” of hardware and since locking into a two-year Cingular / AT&T commitment when getting the BlackJack back in December has no desire to switch to such an unproven commodity. And besides, how would one convey ‘iPhone’ in Mexican? Certainly there has been no translation made available and when I stopped to pick up a day-laborer on my way in to the office he had no idea about what I described. No, I shall wait… for I have the patience of a saint.

Correction From Yesterday’s Blog
In yesterday’s blog I made this bold statement

… Dinosaur Jr. — “Almost Ready” (J. Mascis if a fucking guitar genius)

Apparently, while Mascis is a great guitarist he is no match for comedian David Cross. Check out the awesomeness of the J. Mascis v. David Cross face-off in Guitar Hero II.

ITP Flickr Pic
Check out the Jackmobile, now adorned with YakRack v2.5 which is pimped out with stickers.

Rack And Roll

This weekend, perhaps even today, I think that I will be adding a second tray to the YakRack so that it doesn’t look so pathetic. When I am seen driving down the road I want the YakRack to have two trays so that it can convey the message “I’m available and I’ll let you get on top if you want, baby.” Timmy, do you think that that is wrong?

Third Place May Be Second Loser But It’s Still Worth $20
Meet The Hashers reformed, with a few additional brains (Little Easy and Dunkin’ HoNuts), last night at Raging Burrito in Decatur.

The Gods were nervous and they tried everything, including dropping water from the sky, in order to knock us off our game. We were too smart for them as we nabbed the only outdoor tables which were covered by a roof. As it turned out we should have saved some of those smarts for a few of the questions as we limped toward the game’s finish line in third place.

Look Ma! I’ll Soon Be Turning Fifty!
Beers. Not years. Why you gotta be like that Timmy?

Last night I inched two beers closer to fifty, taking my current Taco Mac count to forty-nine.

Knowing that I would be headed to trivia later in the evening I played it safe by following the time-tested drinking rhyme

Something old
Something new
Keep it all amber
Just like your poo

The “old” was an Abita Amber Ale. The “new” was a (Stevens) Point Amber Ale. The rest of the rhyme is left up to the reader to solve.

Sunday Is Canada Day
Oooooh!!! Yeaaaaah!!!

However, you should remember that since we are currently in a drought and under watering restrictions you may only bag one Canadian on Sunday. Admit it Timmy, if you go out and bag more than one Canadian on a given day you are really too much of a whore anyway, so just settle down already.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood – twisted (all this nonsense from a drug-free brain to boot!)
Current Music – Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Wilco — “Hate It Here” (Wilco doing there best Beatles impersonation)
Website Of The Day – Sometimes Nature calls when you are nowhere near your favorite commode. What to do? Whip out your fancy new iPhone and point its web browser at MizPee to find the closest place that has acceptable facilities. That’s what you do. Just keep the iPhone in your pants while you do your “business”, okay? Thanks.
Exercise (b)Log – I couldn’t have been lazier if I tried, and I tried hard.
Mode Of Transportation To Work – My car

June Goals
1) Lose five pounds. (starting weight 200+ lbs)

Paulie [eatl/ga]

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4 Responses to And I Quote “And Now For Something Completely Different!”

  1. Steve says:

    The jackmobile does look dapper with the new airfoil. I wished I’d known about trivia at RB, as we were somewhat available last night- although the “children” were getting all twitterpated with the weather.

    And as you eluded to, the old adage in technology is, “Never be the first one on your block.”


  2. Martha says:

    Okay, who put what into Paul’s drink last night…and can I have some.

    You sound much better today.

  3. It might have something to do with the four beers I had last night. 🙂

  4. We sure could use more Canadian women up in this bitch. All the ones I’ve ever met are really fantastic.

    As for the Iphone, according to The Great Satan (AT&T) I’m eligible for a phone upgrade in April of 2036. Or something equally ridiculous. What I really want is a Nokia flip with Bluetooth 2.+ and real 3g (like EV-DO, AT&T’s EDGE is more like 1.25g). Unfortunately for me this is currently impossible combination.

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